Celebrating Indian Womanhood – the urban way
Chetan Bhagat , the celebrity novelist writes a column in the Times of India. In one such column he wrote:
Quote
A recent survey by Nielsen has revealed that Indian women are the most stressed out in the world: 87% of our women feel stressed out most of the time. This statistic alone has caused me to stress out. Even in workaholic America, only 53% women feel stressed.
Unquote
As I delved on the thought, my memory took me back to yesteryears when commuting from Vashi to my workplace in SoBo (an acronym for South Bombay nee Mumbai) , I had to literally jump off the train ,no sooner did it touch the platform at the VT station and hasten across nay sprint across the two maidans to reach office ( my best record has been four and half minutes across Azad maidan and Cross maidan, which normally is a ten minute walk) only to find that as you are panting and climbing the office steps , the administrative officer in charge of muster , would gleefully and hurriedly cross the muster with a red mark, indicating late attendance. You look at the clock above and find that you have just missed the muster by a few seconds. Three late marks in a month meant foregoing of casual leave. Reading this account one may be tempted to ask , why didn’t you start early? I was also asked such question and their variants like : Why do you want to be an officer? (my wife chose to be a clerk so that she does not have stress) Or why do you work at all?
I realised that quizzing was so easy but when one went through the Agnidivya so to say, and visualise the entire four hour period prior to reaching office just to catch the muster one would know that every Indian working woman undergoes the stress of balancing home and office. Mind you the stress was not of work but of such non- issues , which if taken care of, the woman can give her best both to her home and office.
Let me take you through this routine for better appreciation of the situation. To reach office at 9.25 am one had to start from Vashi at about 7.30 am and go to Mankhurd station as in those days trains had not reached Vashi. The train frequency used to be anything from about 15 minutes to half an hour and so if you miss the 8.02 , you were doomed to may be 8.20 . Hence 7.30 was the perfect time that assured you of a easy day. Now let’s work backwards. You get up at the break of dawn as you want to cook a full meal for your children because the earliest that you would be back home is 7.30 pm. So that means preparing for a lunch and two tiffins in between. Include yours and hubby dear’s lunch boxes.
So you wake up at about 5 am and start through your chores. There is the tea, the cooker, the chapatis, water bottles, packing of about twenty tiffin boxes for a family of four. Oh, you can always keep a servant – so very true. But pray, who would come at 6 am? As you go through the chores, simultaneously you wake up the children, bathe them and ready them for the day. Getting ready, performing the puja - And as you triumphantly open the door to take the children to the baby sitter the younger one vomits. What does one do? Your clothes are soiled, the child is in distress and the watch is ticking away. You quickly wash, change and try to cope.Only to find that its 7.40 am and the sprinting has to start. ( agreed that the child would not vomit every day but then sometimes it was that the milkman came late, or the cooker valve went off or there was no water or child was sick....whatever) Rush , Rush , Rush – that’s all one can do.
This mind you is only half the story. The journey back home and the responsibilities thereafter is another saga.Sharing and caring of children, taking their studies, reading a bedtime story - all done with joy but with one eye on the clock. When one wants to be an ideal employee, an ideal wife and ideal mother, one just cant afford to be wasting time.
One has become a mother, wife, employee by choice. No one has forced it and so the entire responsibility is yours. Parents have lovingly educated the girl and so the urban woman wants to establish an identity of her own. It is this fire within that keeps her going against all odds. The little that men could do is just ease out these avoidable stress areas.
Yet all men are not the same. Long years of experience teaches you to spot men who appreciate the role of the woman and her aspirations. I had a boss to whom I had explained my conditions. I had told him, ‘Sir, you take care of the muster and I will fully shoulder the departmental responsibility’ It worked so well cause being ridden of anxiety, I could give my best to the institution. Those were wonder years because I could even finish my higher studies at one go. With the right boost to the morale, one can work wonders. When I look back at those days I shudder. Will I be able to repeat that feat again?
Nevertheless I would like to thank all my bosses who enjoyed making the work environment challenging. Had it not been for them we working women would not have emerged stronger not just emotionally but even spiritually.
It would not be fair if I do mot make a special mention. In this entire milieu there were two oasis - special resting place for us. One was our train where we forgot all worries and co mingled with other women, celebrated birthdays, anniversaries, haldi kumkum, gossiped, chanted prayers together, sang songs , learnt various handicraft or simply slept off to refresh our tiring bodies and souls. The other oasis was lunch time. We women followed one rule at lunch time. No office discussion. It was just sharing of meals, fun and frolic. At the end of the meals , we would then go for a short stroll and one of us used to crack a prized joke specially culled for the group. We parted and went to our respective work areas with a chuckle and smile on the face. Right in the middle of the day – it eased our daily dose of stress.
‘Long black thick curly tresses of hair’ - an identity of an Indian woman be it the heroines from stories of Premchand or novels of Sarat Chandra. Now tresses are replaced with stresses. Those who cope emerge stronger. Those who can’t , join hands to form the 87 % of Nielson’s statistics.
Anagha Hunnurkar
July 17, 2012
Chetan Bhagat , the celebrity novelist writes a column in the Times of India. In one such column he wrote:
Quote
A recent survey by Nielsen has revealed that Indian women are the most stressed out in the world: 87% of our women feel stressed out most of the time. This statistic alone has caused me to stress out. Even in workaholic America, only 53% women feel stressed.
Unquote
As I delved on the thought, my memory took me back to yesteryears when commuting from Vashi to my workplace in SoBo (an acronym for South Bombay nee Mumbai) , I had to literally jump off the train ,no sooner did it touch the platform at the VT station and hasten across nay sprint across the two maidans to reach office ( my best record has been four and half minutes across Azad maidan and Cross maidan, which normally is a ten minute walk) only to find that as you are panting and climbing the office steps , the administrative officer in charge of muster , would gleefully and hurriedly cross the muster with a red mark, indicating late attendance. You look at the clock above and find that you have just missed the muster by a few seconds. Three late marks in a month meant foregoing of casual leave. Reading this account one may be tempted to ask , why didn’t you start early? I was also asked such question and their variants like : Why do you want to be an officer? (my wife chose to be a clerk so that she does not have stress) Or why do you work at all?
I realised that quizzing was so easy but when one went through the Agnidivya so to say, and visualise the entire four hour period prior to reaching office just to catch the muster one would know that every Indian working woman undergoes the stress of balancing home and office. Mind you the stress was not of work but of such non- issues , which if taken care of, the woman can give her best both to her home and office.
Let me take you through this routine for better appreciation of the situation. To reach office at 9.25 am one had to start from Vashi at about 7.30 am and go to Mankhurd station as in those days trains had not reached Vashi. The train frequency used to be anything from about 15 minutes to half an hour and so if you miss the 8.02 , you were doomed to may be 8.20 . Hence 7.30 was the perfect time that assured you of a easy day. Now let’s work backwards. You get up at the break of dawn as you want to cook a full meal for your children because the earliest that you would be back home is 7.30 pm. So that means preparing for a lunch and two tiffins in between. Include yours and hubby dear’s lunch boxes.
So you wake up at about 5 am and start through your chores. There is the tea, the cooker, the chapatis, water bottles, packing of about twenty tiffin boxes for a family of four. Oh, you can always keep a servant – so very true. But pray, who would come at 6 am? As you go through the chores, simultaneously you wake up the children, bathe them and ready them for the day. Getting ready, performing the puja - And as you triumphantly open the door to take the children to the baby sitter the younger one vomits. What does one do? Your clothes are soiled, the child is in distress and the watch is ticking away. You quickly wash, change and try to cope.Only to find that its 7.40 am and the sprinting has to start. ( agreed that the child would not vomit every day but then sometimes it was that the milkman came late, or the cooker valve went off or there was no water or child was sick....whatever) Rush , Rush , Rush – that’s all one can do.
This mind you is only half the story. The journey back home and the responsibilities thereafter is another saga.Sharing and caring of children, taking their studies, reading a bedtime story - all done with joy but with one eye on the clock. When one wants to be an ideal employee, an ideal wife and ideal mother, one just cant afford to be wasting time.
One has become a mother, wife, employee by choice. No one has forced it and so the entire responsibility is yours. Parents have lovingly educated the girl and so the urban woman wants to establish an identity of her own. It is this fire within that keeps her going against all odds. The little that men could do is just ease out these avoidable stress areas.
Yet all men are not the same. Long years of experience teaches you to spot men who appreciate the role of the woman and her aspirations. I had a boss to whom I had explained my conditions. I had told him, ‘Sir, you take care of the muster and I will fully shoulder the departmental responsibility’ It worked so well cause being ridden of anxiety, I could give my best to the institution. Those were wonder years because I could even finish my higher studies at one go. With the right boost to the morale, one can work wonders. When I look back at those days I shudder. Will I be able to repeat that feat again?
Nevertheless I would like to thank all my bosses who enjoyed making the work environment challenging. Had it not been for them we working women would not have emerged stronger not just emotionally but even spiritually.
It would not be fair if I do mot make a special mention. In this entire milieu there were two oasis - special resting place for us. One was our train where we forgot all worries and co mingled with other women, celebrated birthdays, anniversaries, haldi kumkum, gossiped, chanted prayers together, sang songs , learnt various handicraft or simply slept off to refresh our tiring bodies and souls. The other oasis was lunch time. We women followed one rule at lunch time. No office discussion. It was just sharing of meals, fun and frolic. At the end of the meals , we would then go for a short stroll and one of us used to crack a prized joke specially culled for the group. We parted and went to our respective work areas with a chuckle and smile on the face. Right in the middle of the day – it eased our daily dose of stress.
‘Long black thick curly tresses of hair’ - an identity of an Indian woman be it the heroines from stories of Premchand or novels of Sarat Chandra. Now tresses are replaced with stresses. Those who cope emerge stronger. Those who can’t , join hands to form the 87 % of Nielson’s statistics.
Anagha Hunnurkar
July 17, 2012
